Losing My Perspicacity December 4, 2024

South Korea demonstrates how to put down a coup; Things are looking bleak for Pete Hegseth; Texans safety suspended three games for hit on Trevor Lawrence; So long and happy trails to USWNT goalie Alyssa Naeher; and The High Note brought to you by my Muppets fever dream.

Author

Julie DiCaro
December 04, 2024

Good morning and Happy Wednesday!

I bet you didn’t wake up today expecting to hear news about potential new evidence in the OJ Simpson murder case, but here we are. (BTW, can we talk about this entire generation of “I’m not sure OJ did it” younglings who weren’t even born when the trial was happening? I watched just about every second of that trial, and I’m pretty sure we know who did it).

What would have been a wild story was quickly put to rest Tuesday when Bloomington police issued a statement clarifying that no, it was not in possession of a recorded O.J. Simpson murder confession.

TMZ reported Tuesday afternoon that Bloomington police may have unwittingly come into possession of such a recording after arresting a former bodyguard of Simpson’s more than two years ago.

But about two hours after that report published, the suburban police department sent out a release that said the belongings seized during the arrest of Iroc Avelli had been inspected and officers “did not locate any information of evidentiary value for the Los Angeles Police Department.”

Turns out, LAPD has been on the lookout for this “confession” for a while.

In June of this year, about two months after Simpson died at age 76, Los Angeles police contacted Bloomington police.

They said Avelli and his attorney said one of the thumb drives in the backpack contained a recording of Simpson confessing to the infamous 1994 murder of his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and Ron Goldman, according to Bloomington police.

To quote Johnny Carson, that is weird, wild stuff. I thought we already had a confession from OJ, courtesy of HarperCollins.

Having now dated myself with two different references to things, as my kids would say, from the 1900s,” let’s get on with it.

Today: South Korea demonstrates how to put down a coup; Things are looking bleak for Pete Hegseth; Texans safety suspended three games for hit on Trevor Lawrence; So long and happy trails to USWNT goalie Alyssa Naeher; and The High Note brought to you by my Muppets fever dream.

One last thing before we get to the news. Wikipedia needs your help. I know, I know, you’re not “supposed” to use Wiki for research, which has never made sense to me. While I don’t take things in the body of the entry at face value, those little endnotes have taken me to hundreds of primary sources over the years, both for writing columns and in writing my book. I find it an invaluable resource and would be lost without it,

Wikimedia is asking everyone who has used Wikipedia in the past year to donate just $2.75 to help them keep the platform alive. I tossed them more than that, given how much I use it. Please consider sending some love their way.

With that, let’s get to the news.

Oh hey, South Korea just fought off a fascist coup

South Korea put down an authoritarian coup in less time than we spend watching the NFL on Sunday. All of this happened while most of the country was asleep, and the South Koreans, to their credit, had stomped out President Yoon Suk Yeol’s blatant power grab by the time most of the country woke up.

Here’s what Laura Bassett wrote over at Nightcap.

In one of the the most stunning “ICYMI” situations in recent history, thousands of South Koreans—some of them kinda drunk, per a reporter on the scene who was also drunk and live-skeeting it (skeets are the new tweets), because this all started around 11 pm—just heroically shut down a fascist coup by their Trumpian president, Yoon Suk Yeol, overnight. It was a masterclass in resisting authoritarianism and also the opposite of what we do in the face of wannabe dictators, which is to re-elect them to give them a second shot.

**

For those who missed it, as any South Koreans who went to bed before 10:30 p.m. Tuesday night likely did, allow me to recap the highlights: Right-wing President Yoon Suk Yeol, who rose to power as part of an antifeminist, anti-“Me Too” backlash (much like Trump!), declared emergency martial law Tuesday night, which is essentially a military takeover of the government. In a televised address—as his power was slipping due to corruption scandals and general unpopularity—Yoon randomly accused opposing political parties of pro-North Korean sympathies and vague “anti-state activities.” South Korea’s democratic party quickly sounded the alarm on what was “essentially a coup d’état,” at which point MPs (members of parliament) leapt out of bed and civilians began pouring out into the streets in near-freezing weather to mobilize and stop the power grab.

Wow. I’d love to think that our congressional reps would do the same, but let’s be honest. Can you really see Lindsey Graham jumping out of bed in the middle of the night (in his George Jetson pajamas and stocking cap, holding a single candle up to the light) to save democracy? Personally, I can not.

The National Assembly needed a majority vote to override the president’s declaration of martial law, but the military tried to stop the lawmakers from getting into the capitol at all to cast a vote in the middle of the night—so angry civilians literally boosted these guys’ asses over the barricades to get into the building. Lee Jae-myung, the leader of the nation’s Democratic Party, live-streamed himself scaling the walls to vote. A woman lawmaker, former news anchor Ahn Gwi-ryeong, was filmed grabbing a soldier’s gun with the barrel pointed at her chest.

I’ll stop ripping off Laura’s newsletter now (which is fantastic, and everyone should subscribe), but her description of this entire night had me absolutely riveted.

Anyway, the National Assembly (South Korea’s congress) got a majority of lawmakers together in less than three hours and voted unanimously to reject Yeo'l’s martial law decree. A few hours later, Yeol backed down and the entire thing was over. What a ride. And that, my friends, is how you put down a coup.

It feels worth noting that all of South Korea seems to agree that fascism is bad, an advantage I’m not sure we have in this country at the moment.

Study up, Americans, because I have a feeling I know who was watching closely and wondering how he could make it work here.

It’s looking bleak for Pete Hegseth - thank God

Though I will point out, once again, that a documented history of misogyny and abusing women, accusations leveled by no less than Hegeeth’s mother, for crying out loud, were not enough to derail his nomination. Once again, Howard Dean, weird yell in Iowa, etc.

I didn’t get a chance to read Jane Mayer’s masterful takedown of Hegseth in The New Yorker until today. The concerns have primarily shifted from Hegseth being a misogynist who has a history of molesting women to Hegseth being a misogynist who has a history of molesting women and alcohol abuse. Just kidding, it’s totally just the alcohol abuse now.

According to Mayer, the New Yorker got their hands on an email from a whistle-blower after Hegseth stepped down from Concerned Veterans for America.

But, according to three knowledgeable sources, one of whom contributed to the whistle-blower report, Hegseth was forced to step down from the organization in part because of concerns about his mismanagement and abuse of alcohol on the job.

“Congratulations on Removing Pete Hegseth” is the subject line of an e-mail, obtained by The New Yorker, that was sent to Hegseth’s successor as president of the group, Jae Pak, on January 15, 2016. The e-mail, sent under a pseudonym by one of the whistle-blowers, included a copy of the report, and went on to say, “Among the staff, the disgust for Pete was pretty high. Most veterans do not think he represents them nor their high standard of excellence.” The e-mail also stated that Hegseth had “a history of alcohol abuse” and had “treated the organization funds like they were a personal expense account—for partying, drinking, and using CVA events as little more than opportunities to ‘hook up’ with women on the road.”

****

The whistle-blower report makes extensive allegations. It describes several top managers being involved in drunken episodes, including an altercation at a casino and a hotel Christmas party at which food was thrown from the balcony. Hegseth, it says, was “seen drunk at multiple CVA events” between 2013 and 2015, a time when the organization was engaged in an ambitious nationwide effort to mobilize veterans to vote for conservative candidates and causes. The project gave Hegseth and his team the opportunity to travel far from the organization’s headquarters, in northern Virginia. Hegseth and his team gave speeches, assisted conservative campaigns, and collected voter data valuable for the Kochs’ political operation. As a decorated veteran who by 2014 had become an on-air contributor to Fox News, Hegseth was the public face of the group’s mission, conducting a whistle-stop tour with his team from city to city, packaged by C.V.A. as the Defend Freedom Tour.

As someone who relies on medication to treat mental illness, I never want to denigrate a person just for having an addiction, especially as so many addictions are self-medication of emotional pain (I also have a grandfather I never met who drank himself to death after a stint in a Pacific POW camp during WWII, and I know that many veterans suffer from untreated trauma). However, someone with this kind of track record, absent evidence of treatment and recovery, absolutely can not be allowed within 500 miles of the Pentagon.

And there’s a lot more:

In late November, 2014, Hegseth and his team deployed to Louisiana for a U.S. Senate runoff. This is when, according to the whistle-blower complaint, Hegseth took the C.V.A. team to the strip club, where “he was so drunk he tried to get on the stage and dance with the strippers.” A female C.V.A. associate, the report says, “had to get him off of the stage,” adding, “She had to intervene with security to prevent him from getting thrown out.” The whistle-blower continued, as if in disbelief, “A Fox News contributor, with the rank of captain (at the time) in the National Guard, and the CEO of a veterans’ organization . . . was in a strip club trying to dance with strippers.”

Meanwhile, the female staffer who had to restrain Hegseth at the strip club alleged that a different male staff member had attempted to sexually assault her there, according to the report. A C.V.A. manager, however, was described as dismissive, for arguing that her attacker had been drunk and therefore shouldn’t be held responsible. According to the report, the female staffer took steps to file a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, and C.V.A. hired outside counsel

Well good for her. There are a lot more allegations like this in the piece, and while the New Yorker doesn’t allow gift links, if you want to read the entire thing, let me know and I’ll figure out a way to get it to you.

But I still feel like the misogyny and sexual assault should have been enough.

Texans safety Azeez Al-Shaair suspended three games for hit on Trevor Lawrence

I’ll be honest—I have mixed feelings about this suspension. Before I talk about them, here’s the video.

So first, as a mom who took her child out of football because of the reporting coming in on CTE 10+ years ago, I get it. Seeing the hit, the fencing posture, the whole thing was upsetting to watch. And, despite what the NFL likes to tell us about special helmets, I’ve been told by neurologists that there is nothing you can put on the outside of your head to stop your brain from sloshing around inside your head when you take a hit like this. In my opinion, the NFL has been somewhat disingenuous about stopping concussions. Unless we move to flag football, it’s unlikely to happen.

Watching the hit at full speed, he hit Lawrence at the same time he started his slide, which is how I remember seeing a lot of guys getting hit as a kid and well into my adulthood. Recently, the NFL has made hitting quarterbacks practically illegal, which seems unfair to the rest of the guys on the field. Sometimes, your momentum gets the best of you, and when 250 pounds starts flying through the air, it’s hard to stop it. I always try to give the defensive player the benefit of the doubt.

However, this isn’t the first time Al-Shaair has been disciplined this year for late hits. He was fined for a late hit on Tennessee running back Tony Pollard in November, and again for throwing a punch at the Bears’ Roschon Johnson back in September. Had Al-Shaair not already had a reputation for this kind of thing, I can’t help but wonder if he gets a suspension at all.

For what it’s worth, Al-Shaair did post an apology over on the bad site.

Farewell, Alyssa Naeher — thanks for the memories

USWNT keeper Alyssa Naeher retired from international play today, following the US’ 2-1 victory over the Netherlands. Naeher has been on the USWNT roster since she backed up Hope Solo in 2015, and was in goal for every minute of the USWNT’s 2019 World Cup Championship and passed Solo for most shutouts in a single Olympics in Paris in 2024. To say she’ll be missed is a huge understatement.

Luckily, NWSL fans will still get to see her play for the Chicago Red Stars.

Thanks, keep.

The High Note

This may be a high note, it may make you unsubscribe, I’ll leave it up to you.

Lately, I’ve been wondering how it is that we haven’t gotten a Muppet version of Les Mis. I mean, it seems like such an obvious move, right? The most tragic musical in the history of theater performed by an unruly, chaotic group of beloved puppets.

So I took a stab at casting it.

Tell me you don’t want to see Sweetums dying in Marius’ arms while singing “A Little Fall of Rain.” You know you do.

Then I saw this on TikTok, and I feel like the fates are aligning.

@_harrygrant_

A truly bizarre crossover #lesmiserables #lesmiserablesarenatour #themuppets #michaelball #alfieboe @Michael Ball @Alfie Boe

My friend Tim has rightfully pointed out that Statler and Waldorf would make a smashing Madame and Monsieur Thenardier. Another Bluesky user suggested Gavroche should be the only human in the film, and he should be portrayed by Timothee Chalamet. I am here for all these suggestions. You’re welcome or I’m sorry.

If you’re mad at me for ruining the greatest musical ever (I would counter that the Muppets only improve upon things), please enjoy this video of the Cal football team celebrating their equipment manager for laying out a helmet thief.

@bleacherreport

Chasedown speed was RIDICULOUS 😤 (via MWCherrington/X, jaydnott/IG, h/t graham_sfn/IG) #collegefootball #cfb #football #cal

Survive and advance today. Don’t let the bastards get you down.

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