Good morning and Happy Monday! Thanks for starting your day with me and LMP.

So, I did a thing on Sunday. I posted about an issue that has been weighing on me a lot, and it suddenly got much bigger than I intended. Now, I feel vulnerable, exposed, and embarrassed. So I figured I would talk about it here, and if you want to skip this entire newsletter today, I totally get it. Tomorrow won’t be about me, I promise.

Here’s the post in question:

That was a hard thing to admit, but it felt like the right time to say it, as ashamed as I might be. I went on to post a whole thread, and the reactions began pouring in.

I made the switch from Family Law (which was literally killing my soul) to journalism in 2014 or so. A few years later, I was lucky enough to get hired as on-air talent by the brand-new WGN all-sports partner station, The Game. I was there all of nine months when we found out they were shutting the station down while on the air.

I was lucky, though. I was pretty quickly scooped up by the biggest sports talk station in town, 670 The Score. I had my own nightly show and a weekend show with the fantastic Maggie Hendricks for four years or so, until COVID hit. At that point, The Score let several people go, including both Maggie and myself, leaving the station with no women on-air for many months, if not much longer.

But I was lucky again; I got hired immediately by Deadspin, who had jettisoned all its original staff the previous fall. And even though I initially said, “There’s no way I’m writing for Deadspin,” the reality of having two kids in college at the time won out, and I worked as a Sr. Writer/Sr. Editor/EIC there for four years.

In March (April?) of 2024, the private equity firm that owned Deadspin sold it to a European buyer, and the entire staff was let go. And that was it. That was the last time I worked for anyone other than myself.

By that time in my career, I’d been a public defender, an attorney for domestic abuse victims, a private family law attorney, a partner in a law firm, a social media marketing specialist, a columnist, an investigative reporter, a podcast host/producer, a sports talk radio host, an author, and an EIC. I’ve won two Gracie Awards, a Peabody Award, and a lot more besides. In other words, I felt like the breadth of my experience meant there were a lot of things I could do well.

Wow, did the job market not agree.

No matter how many jobs I applied for, I rarely even got an interview. Meanwhile, I was watching fresh-out-of-college kids whose work I had heavily edited to make it fit for publishing get gigs I never heard back about. I tried networking. I tried putting out the word that I was looking for a new gig. I had someone revamp my resume to make it more “AI-friendly.” On the advice of friends, I took my graduation dates off my resume, so that prospective employers couldn’t tell my age. About a year in, I started applying for jobs I never thought I would — entry-level positions that I was overqualified for. Nothing. Not even a nibble. After two years of unemployment, I can count the number of interviews I’ve had on one hand. Even Costco never called me back.

It seemed, at 53 years old, the world had decided I had nothing more to contribute to society.

It’s so ironic, because I performed well at so many jobs while I was dead on my feet, working full-time and raising two boys who took part in a ton of activities. At times, my husband traveled quite a bit for work, and there are entire years of my life where I was so tired, I don’t remember much, if anything. And yet I kept moving up the ladder. Kept succeeding.

But now, now that my kids are grown and I have all the energy in the world to devote to my career … crickets.

It’s doubly crazy because so many younger women advance their careers while devoting half their energy to something else, like raising children, caring for aging parents, rescuing animals, etc. Not only do women my age have a wealth of experience and knowledge, but we also know how to manage our time effectively, work well with others, and get things done. We’re multitasking champs. We speak plainly. We cut to the chase and ask the important questions. We know what we’re doing. We finally have our shit together, and now we’re not wanted, apparently.

It’s embarrassing to admit all of this, especially if, like me, so much of your identity is wrapped up in achieving. I blame the “gifted child” programs of the 80s for setting us all up for failure, along with me being the stereotypical over-achieving oldest daughter, but it really doesn’t matter how I got here. I’m here now.

What I learned from Sunday’s ill-conceived semi-viral post is that I am far from alone.

And the replies like these keep on coming in. Mostly from women, but also from Gen X men. We’ve all had successful careers, we’ve all been laid off due to forces beyond our control, and we’re all (seemingly permanently) out of work. One person said to me, “It’s part of getting old, and it sucks.” But I am NOT getting “old.” I’ll be “old” when I’m in my 80s. Right now, I have more energy, wisdom, experience, and poise than I ever did in my 30s. And it’s all being directed to volunteering, this newsletter, and romantasy books. Because I can’t get a job.

It shouldn’t be like this. And we’re not imagining it.

Not only that, because of the current state of the economy (read, AI and private equity destroying jobs), Gen X may be the first generation in American history to need a universal basic income because of “late career job loss.”

The media and creative industries have been hit especially hard by the AI boom/private equity double whammy. Where are all those who lost jobs supposed to go?

I’m sure those who have been trolling me since 2015 are lining up to tell you that I don’t have a job because I suck, I’m terrible at everything, and no one likes me. But I’ve always succeeded at my jobs, and was regularly singled out for praise by my managers. Though I’m sure that speaking out about what the sports media industry is like for women and being a devout union-lover hasn’t helped my cause. (If you can join a union, you should.) Oh, and one literary agent told me I’ll never sell another book because I deleted my Twitter account (where I had 40k-some followers). So I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.

There’s no doubt that ageism is playing a role here, and I’ve been told as much by those whose job is to help people find jobs. When I was at one job, the 22-year-old newbie receptionist was in charge of screening resumes for qualified candidates, and I have no doubt that he thought anyone over 40 was positively ancient. But with Donald Trump in office and the EEOC now pivoting to protect white men, there’s nowhere to turn for recourse. No one cares what demographics are and aren’t getting hired. It’s everyone for themselves out here.

These days, too many resumes are “screened” by AI, which has already been shown to have an ageism bias, especially against women (shocker).

This got me thinking about the whole anti-DEI/meritocracy sham the right loves to tout, which was brilliantly taken apart by Jon Stewart on The Daily Show recently.

So, to recap, the federal government is super-cool with firing all the women, Black people, people over 40, disabled people, and everyone else who’s not a cishet white male, and we’re stuck in a war we can’t get out of; the Pentagon is running out of cash and weapons; there’s no protection against discrimination for anyone; our food is dirty, the National Mall is a mess; data centers are polluting everything; the mainstream media is disasater; our NATO allies hate us, and the HHS has come out against vaccines. Did I miss anything? I’m sure I did.

Hey, maybe this isn’t a “meritocracy” after all. Maybe kicking all the people who know how to get things done out of the job market is why we are where we are. It’s almost like DEI was the real “meritocracy,” because we were doing a hell of a lot better under DEI than under Trump.

At this point in my life, I’ve “reinvented” myself so many times to keep with the changing industry that I fear I have no pivot left in me. Though I won’t lie, I applied to be seasonal help at my local garden center today because it sounded awesome. It’s part-time and pays $16 per hour. That’s much less than either of my Gen Z sons makes in their entry-level jobs. Sometimes I still can’t figure out how I got to this point.

But in all seriousness, I spent my entire career moving up the ladder, trying to get to a position significant enough that my work could affect real change for people, in whatever way possible. Now that I’m over 50, the only thing that has changed is my sense of urgency and my level of rage at the powers that be. Kicking our legs out from under GenX just before we make it to the point of having a say in the world feels especially cruel, as our entire lives have felt like we arrived at the party 10 minutes too late to take part in any of the fun the Boomer set had.

I’ll wrap this up by reminding us all that, however hard white women have it, Black women and other women of color have it worse, and so do members of the LGBTQ+ community and the disabled community.

So what are we to do? I’m open to suggestions. I’d like to get paid to write again. I’d love to work in radio or podcasting again. I miss sportswriting. I love research. I’d like to do something that matters to the world, like working for a non-profit or public interest organization. At this point, I have no idea where to go next.

But my deep, dark secret is off my chest now. And now I know that many other women my age are in the same boat. How do we all band together to handle this? If anyone has any ideas, please let me know. God knows I’m all out of ideas.

We’ll get back to the news tomorrow - see you then!

Each Day, I do my best to leave you with a smile on your face, a song in your heart, and the will to fight another day.

Hey, you know who else is over 50 and still rocks? The Chicks.

So suck on that, world.

Hey, survive and advance out there today, kids. Don’t let the bastards get you down.

Follow Julie on Bluesky and Instagram so she can get another book contract.